Well it looks like i got to leave the studio then. I feel pretty depressed about it. Oh sure i could just never do plaster work ever again, but thats just not on, eh. I love plaster. Its like i'm being shunned cos i love somebody who's not accepted cos they're..... dusty. Its kinda weird i feel like its really personal... like a dirty secret they all know now.. i hid it for ages, but now its out.. i make dust - i am a bad bad person.. i make DIRT, actually, cos dust is often wrongly called dirt.. i deserve to be scorned... filthy sculptor... its not like theres a support group for us. Damn. They say they like me orright, they just don't like my dust. WELL MY DUST IS ME. I *AM* MY DUST. So thus i feel depressed hahaha.
I guess this Open Studio will be my Farewell. Its funny cos i was gonna go a month or 2 ago, but i thought i won't let em down for the Open Studio. Ha. Am i stupid. Anyway pack up over next few days & I'll just piss off as soon as i can so i don't have to pay another month's rent. Mum says i can use the front yard again which is very nice of her cos it will make her lovely garden all white again like before. Its a bummer tho i feel already like a stranger in the studio & the studio is unwelcoming to me. Eh, fuckit. My tools still love me - no matter what.
Anyway i'm leaving. Its a shame but.
In other entertaining news, i got road raged today by some feul. U got to just bloody laff when a 4wd tries to scare you by ducking in front & jamming on his brakes as hard as he can. Cos anything else on the rd can outbrake an overweight 4wd, lets face it, its the dumbest possible attempt to road rage in the history of stupidity. The 4wd nosedived at the ground like it was gonna roll & he practically lost it, ended up diagonal & 4 ft into the intersection. Since i was actually already braking for the orange light it had no effect on me whatsoever, bar one poofteenth more pressure on the pedal. I can guess from this obvious "payback" manouver that i had originally slighted him by actually going 40kmh in the school zone & then stopping for the orange light when there were little kids waiting to cross. He was tailgating me at the time. He tried to scare me by driving beside really close too, which was peculiar cos his car was worth 10 times what mine is. And my eyesight in that eye is so bad i didn't realise for ages he was doing anything. Meh.. idjit like that will come to a bad end.. sooner the better. Just a paranoid idiot with no dick... lots of em about eh.
The funniest thing is people who are really fucked in the head always think your motivations are what theirs are: i.e. that you were going to run an orange light & even that you were going to the left at the turn off, cos he was still "blocking" even as he was going off to the left & i went right. I've met people like that before & they just think you are out to do what they would do. Its weird how they cannot see.
On a good note tho, and u always like to end on a good note, have discovered a wonder. First saw this thing at a mates place it was his kids toy. A stormtrooper from star wars, which u may think 'WTF don't be such a geek'. But they've made this little fellow so well he is multi jointed & adjustable into the most lovely attitudes, & i think there is even a bunch of ppl on Flickr doing sets of stormtrooper photos cos these things are so expressive. I reckon they are incredibly sculptural & you can really put life in em very easily. People should be using these to model from, not those pox ridden jointed wooden figures people seem to think mean Artist, even tho anatomically, structurally, functionally, mechanically & emotionally they are absolute utter arse. Anyway i ordered one o these stormtroopers off ebay (too late to buy them thru real shops anymore) and he arrived all mint cond on card (MOC) for collector & i ripped it open. Sadly his hat falls off a bit easily, & he has a real head underneath - not as expressive as a helmet for some reason & the eyes are painted on all rolled up in his head like he just got conked. But anyway he is still awesome as all hell. I remember i had some kind of stormtrooper or vader figure when i was a kid & it was pretty crap, the arms & legs were dead straight & it had no life at all, it only had like one pose. But these are truly amazing little fellers & i'm going to have to get a few more. It came with a plastic silver coin so if you're out there lookin on ebay for one be sure to get the right kind. If you get a classic old one you'll maybe get one like i had when i was a kid, like an ice maiden of stormtroopers.
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